English 421K, Technical Writing

Hello,

I've attached my response to you in the form of a Word document. I did "Track Changes" with comments for your convenience.

If something doesn't make sense, or if you have a question for me, feel free to let me know.

Thanks,
Erin

I am having trouble doing track changes on my home computer, so I will try and do it on here.

I really like the visuals that you have used throughout you paper. They made it very easy to get through the document. One thing that I think will make your paper a little easier to read is to right justify your subheadings throughout the paper. I think by centering them it messes up the flow of the paper, and makes it a little harder to get through visually.

Other than that, I read through LanaRyan's comments, and agreed with the things that she said!

Let me know if you have any questions!

Daniel

i think your class schedule heading should go on the next page. under tuition payment the "you can select any of the following links" looks a little funny. otherwise i think it looks good. reads well. good flow. i like it.

Your information is very well organized, and very well integrated with the images. I especially like the juxtaposition of the image of headings to descriptions of those headings. For suggestions, I would consider the necessity of the orange text. It was attention grabbing, but I'm not sure how effective it is on a white background. More importantly, there seems to be a tonal shift throughout your description. The language shifts between technical and more conversational; for example, in the "Getting Started" section there are phrases such as "more logically" and "should have been" which suggest a human voice behind the writing. You may want to consider changing the few "should haves" or "should have beens" to "are" or "is." The purpose at this point is to explain the website, not to find an ID number. Overall it was very easy to follow.