English 421K, Technical Writing

This document in its current state is more reminiscent of a journal article than something used as a training guide. My first recommendation would be to analyze the audience. Not only should the scorpion guide be aimed at the faculty of the school, but also the students as well. The author clearly states on page 105 that "...Using...Education to reduce the fear of scorpions will help prevent unnecessary treatments." For this reason, I think that the document itself should be made into two forms. The first form would be for distribution to faculty. Some of the background on the scorpion seems irrelevant to the objective of the document, so it would be possible to remove that section. For each if the remaining subsections, the title needs to be in bold font. Also, each paragraph in each of the respective subsections needs to be summarized into one or two concise sentences and then bulleted under the section's original heading. This document should be no longer than two pages long and should end repeating the main points of the document for repetition. For the second form of the document, the ideas pertaining to student safety should be made into a colorful (contrasted), well organized (good alignment/proximity) flier that can be hung in different areas of the schools.