Group 5 - The Tesla Roadster, Speeding into the future
Submitted by baileyke on Fri, 07/18/2008 - 12:12.
This project is meant to introduce our audience to the Tesla Roadster, a 100% electric sports car. All of our deliverables will be posted here.
When viewing this document in pdf format, keep in mind that it is a booklet. If you would like the Microsoft Publisher document, email Kris and he will get it to you. The last page seems kind of dull because it is the back cover. When viewing this document if you go under the view button, you will find the Page Display button. If you select Two-Up Continuous, you can see the pages next to each other as if you are reading the booklet. A screen shot file is located below.
Produced by:
Kris Bailey
David Baker
Leah Bashover
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Document for Peer Review/First Submission
We were unable to convert the peer review draft to .PDF due to computer issues and file size. However we have been able to convert the first draft to a .PDF.
To view the booklet correctly in Acrobat. Click View (on the tool bar) --> Page Layout --> Continuous - Facing.
Peer Review of initial draft
After reading your draft, I would like to say that you are off to a good start. I really like the color choices you made, and the images you have included are very appealing to a potential buyer.
Writing:
First off, Tracy has suggested a text to image ration of 50/50 max. It seems like your text is actually closer to 75-80% of the document. It is obvious that you have done a lot of research about the Tesla Roadster. I understand the need to explain this completely new and revolutionary concept vehicle to the market, but it seems more like a technical journal than a marketing device. The majority of your paragraphs have 10-15 sentances or more, where Tracy recommends 2-3.
Doc Design:
Like I said above, there is a lot more text than images in this document. Also, the text that is there is a very small font, especially the page on performance and efficiency. Another gripe of mine is the alignment of the numbers on your contents page. Some numbers look like they were tabbed over more than the others. Make sure those line up for the final draft. I would like to restate that the color choices work well and the overall visual presentation is pleasing.
Audience Analysis:
From reading this it seems that you have chosen a general audience rather than a specific group of people. That being said, you do a good job of including information that numerous types of people from all walks of life would be interested with. However, you may find that you can more effectively market the tesla roadster if you focus on a specific target audience, such as the environmentially conscious sports car buyer. I highly doubt a mother of 3 pre-teens would choose an electric 2 seater sports car over a practical van or SUV if they were looking for a new car. I don't feel that the "Tesla Motors - Who are we?" section is really needed. It has nothing to do directly with the car.
Overall, I think that this is a very good document, but slightly misses the point on a marketing standpoint. There is so much text that it seems like a journal or technical white paper instead of a brocure/pamphlet.
Review
Overall I like the document. It has a lot of useful information supplied with eye catching images and a nicely brought together formatting. The information is split into several categories, all separated by pages and easy to find though the table of contents, which I liked. One note about the able of contents is that some of the page numbers didn’t line up correctly, which is an easy fix, but should be fixed to keep the document smooth and professional. I like that it starts with the history, which gives a nice overview of the past behind electrical cars. Although it doesn’t directly relate to the Tesla, it gives the reader a nice bit of information that really gets them into the right mindset. I think the formatting of this area is a little jumpy, with images protruding a bit in a couple directions, but I think the text is pretty well done. For the “Who Are We” page, I think you should give a little information about the company itself, not only the key people. This slide feels a little empty with the big black space in the middle. Following section is nice, I think one thing I would like to see is maybe a picture of the engine or something. This could fill out the page while relating to the text. The next section is nice, but I would like to know where the two quotes come from. Aside from that, it’s a good section. The performance section is very informative but there is a lot of small text on that page. This may distract the reader or scare them away from reading it. The specifications are also well made, but the formatting is a bit off. This should be fixed for smooth flowing in some areas. The review section is good. You say there are lots of positive reviews, so I think a few more quotes or backup to that would be good to add, maybe even just combine the two pages into one single page. Also, looks like the picture slipped down a bit and started to cover up the text, which should be fixed up. The FAQ sections are well written and tie up any loose ends or questions the reader may have, which then lead right into the information about the future and how to get them. I think overall this is a well written document and with a few minor changes or fixes, maybe the addition of some more images, this will really turn into something great. Good job.
Forst I would like to thank
Forst I would like to thank you for your feedback, we will make adjustments accordingly. Tracy said to avoid 50/50 text image ratios and that there should be more text than images. The maximum should be 80% text. The reason we put the history of Teslo motors in is the fact that it is a new company. We wanted to establish not only the roadster, but the Tesla name. Brand identification is key in marketing.
Kris E. Bailey
it would have been much
it would have been much better to review with a PDF version but I made due. In the pdf are my comments. Overall, good job. Only a few minor changes
In Response
Did you read either the document specifications or the introductory message to this project? We couldn't convert it to pdf due to its size and had you wanted the publisher file, you should have emailed me. That last page you say sucks is a back cover, had you read the specifications you should have known that.
Kris E. Bailey