This sounds like a great idea. It will be well liked by the students if it is implemented because students will not have to leave their ID's at the counter and people will also know where the DVD's are located. This proposal sounds well though through and very useful. The only information not included was what type of presentation format you are going to use to complete your instructions for the DVD profiler system. It may be a good idea to use a format that can be easily uploaded and downloaded on the internet so that if the system is set up in the dorms new users can look at it to figure out how to use the software. Great job!

I think that this proposal is a great idea.  Having lived in Wiley for three years, I know that their DVD profiling system is nearly identical to that of Shreve's and this DVD Profiler would be a great help.  I really like the software that you chose for this project.  Although I have never actually used DVD Profiler, it sounds like it will meet all of the specifications that you need it to for this project.  This software will greatly reduce the hassle that the Shreve employees face day-to-day with unreturned DVDs and the large 3-ring binder.  The only thing that I would add to your group would be a defined set of roles for each member.  This might help your team know what his or her role is as you finish the project.  Besides that, I think that you have a great project.

I was happy to see what you chose for your final project. Having lived in Shreve, I know what a pain it is to go downstairs to be disappointed when they don't have a movie I wanted. I think this idea will help save people lots of hassle. Although I have not used DVD Profiler, it sounds like it would work just fine for your intended use. I agree that the only thing that you might want to do is add a section with everyone's defined roles.

I like how much detail you went into describing the DVD Profiler software.  I have never lived in the dorms, but the apartment complex I live in has a similar system of collecting resident IDs in order to rent movies.  It's very inconvenient not having our IDs for other things like tanning and riding the bus.  The proposal you have created seems like it would work in this situation in addition to the dorm situation.  The only thing I still wonder about after reading your proposal is how you plan on executing your proposal to the client.  Elaborating on what sort of presentation you plan on creating would be a nice addition.   

I think this is a very practical and potentially useful proposal. As a computer scientist, I cringe whenever I see a paper-based system like what they seem to have, particularly when it’s complicated and difficult. I’ve not heard of the software you’re proposing to use, but it sounds like it’s well suited to the task of cataloging and tracking DVDs. The added bonus of tracking trends and such is interesting, though I doubt it’ll see much use. I think this is a very good solution to the problem; the system you want to set up seems to be a great improvement for everyone concerned.

There is much potential in this proposal. Your explanation of your client is very strong, and is a very good one. Perhaps, after Shreve Hall implements your DVD Profiler program, other Residential Halls that have DVD collections may end up following suit. It is also good that you mentioned you will be using the Invelos Software and what the program allows you to do. I would however elaborate a bit more on this. In addition, the proposal appears to be lacking work plans. With the addition of these two areas, I believe your proposal will be extremely powerful.

The background information is very relevant in establishing the need for a software such as this. Those details increase  retention in your readers. You also provide persuasive information on the software. But to fully realize the proposal, you need to offer more metacognitive writing about your deliverables and drafting process.

Overall, writing style is engaging and effective. You do good work with sentence variety and verb choices to increase readability. Shorter paragraphs and more descriptive headings will also improve readability. Good font choice.

Please email if you have any questions.