There's something that's hard to really grasp, and that's the idea of there's no actual happily ever after. I know I fantasize about it and such but I think what I've really learnt over the years is that if that's what you're expecting, it's not going to happen.

Things are always going to be happening, it's life. We're going to hear bad news all our lives, but it's not just about the bad news. It's the little things we enjoy and get excited about that get us through the day or the week, or the year. Don't be afraid to be amused by simple things, or happy and enthusiastic for small things. I'm not talking about materialism, I mean like, something you look at that lights up your mind. Colors, things that you enjoy. Things that happen in the day that may seem minimal, but they can really make a difference: watching squirrels run around after things, watching sunrise/sunset, staring at stars, making stories out of clouds, talking to someone for even a minute or two, I dunno. I just know that waiting for something to happen, even though it's something to look forward too, don't just always look for something to happen. Sometimes, you have to make your happiness happen. Yeah, it's great to have things to look forward to, but don't be bored if there isn't something big and amazing waiting for you. Do something, even if it's small. Sometimes, you just need to take that time in between studying or homeworking.

I used to think, okay, this life will soon be over. I have something to look forward to, getting out of here. I'll be out of this house, college will be better, I can get out of this house. Yeah, it's better, but I think I expected a bit too much out of it at times. I often kept thinking, when will this happen? when am I getting out of here? I still think that, and I need to remember that I need to make things happen for myself sometimes.

Life hands many of us lemons all the time, sometimes it feels like it's like a lemon-throwing contest, what's going to make me break? I keep thinking, is that hour over yet?

Looking back, even though things have happened, I miss people I've lost over the years, so many things have happened, but it wasn't all so horrible all the time. There were little things that got me through: eating cherry popsicles while watching the first snow of the season, dance competitions, cookies, running around, water balloon fights, that sort of thing.

I think as kids, when we read fairy-tales, and all those happily-ever after-ized things, we get the wrong idea about life, this whole idea that everything's better in the end. Yeah, things get better, keep faith in the idea that thigns will be better, but the whole happily-ever-after, nothing is ever perfect at the end...okay, it sounds like I'm just blaming stories and whatnot, I know I've fantasized a lot over the years which has gotten me into disappointments, but I really think that when it comes down to it, it's the small things in life that get you through the day.